Praying aloud with your husband is a wonderful way to build a Godly relationship with your husband, but many of us are reluctant or scared to ask our husbands to pray with us because we fear rejection or are worried about it being awkward. If you already pray with your husband, kudos to you! You are strengthening your relationship with your husband and with God each time you pray together. If you occasionally pray with your husband, you are on the right path! Maybe make a commitment this week to pray with your husband each day or every other day. For those of you who have never prayed with your husband, I have some steps for you today to help get you started praying with your husband! I also know there will be some of you whose husbands will refuse to pray with you. In that case, the best thing you can do is pray for your husband. Pray that God may soften his heart and reveal himself to your husband. Also, set a Christ-like example for your husband, so that he might come to know Christ through you.
There are many reasons why you may not be currently praying with your husband. Although you spend quiet time praying to God, you may be nervous to pray out loud, or perhaps you love to pray out loud, but have a more shy and reserved husband who prefers to pray silently. Perhaps you fear that your husband will say “no” when you ask him to pray with you. But think about what is the worst that could happen if you ask your husband to pray and he says “no”? That’s it! He just says “no” and you will both move on. Although by asking him to pray with you, even if he says “no”, you may be planting a seed in his heart, so that at some point in the future, he may be willing to pray with you.
In order to combat some of the fear and anxiety that you or your spouse may have about praying aloud together, I’ve come up with a few steps you can take to ease you both in to praying together.
3 Steps to Start Praying with your Husband:
1) Pray a memorized or pre-written prayer together: Start by saying a memorized or pre-written prayer, such as the Lord’s Prayer, together each day. By starting with a prayer that your husband knows or can read, you take the pressure off of him to come up with prayers in his head which may cause him anxiety and make him reluctant to pray with you.
2) Use a prayer organizer or list: Once you have spent a few weeks (or even months, if needed), reciting a memorized or pre-written prayer together, sit down with your husband for a few minutes and complete a prayer organizer (such as this prayer organizer or this sticky note prayer organizer) or just write down a simple list of things you would both like to pray for. Next split the list between the two of you, for example, you pray for the first half of the items and your husband prays for the second half of the items. Use the list during prayer time with your husband, reading your prayers directly from the list you created.
3) Begin to add spontaneous prayers: After you have prayed together for a few weeks using the prayer organizer or a prayer list, you will likely both have memorized the things you pray for each day. At this point, you may choose to discontinue using the prayer organizer or list and just pray your prayers from memory. Once you begin praying your prayers from memory, you may begin adding spontaneous prayers. Once you begin adding spontaneous prayers, your husband will take notice and may begin adding spontaneous prayers himself. But even if he does not, he is still praying with you and that’s what counts.
Hopefully, these steps will help you initiate prayer with your husband and begin a habit that will strengthen your relationship with your husband and with God throughout your marriage.
Other Posts in the “Building a Godly Relationship with your Husband” Series: